Beneath the glitz of much dating advice lies a cynical reverence for the power of packaging and promotion: “Women, be a vixen. Men, learn to seduce. Everyone keep your partner guessing. Lose weight. Be confident. Get out there more.” At the end of the day, this approach doesn’t lead to love. It leads to insecurity and desperation. Luckily, there is a wiser way.
We’re taught that the search for love is a numbers game, with odds stacked in favor of the most attractive. Well, we’ve been taught wrong! When we approach dating as an intimacy journey rather than a numbers game, our whole experience changes for the better. What are your own intimacy lessons? Your answer to one question can reveal them:
Why do our most intense romantic passions so often end in disaster? There is an insight which can help us unravel this mystery: Our most painful attractions actually arise from our deepest intimacy gifts. This post will help you recognize your own attractions of deprivation, but, even more important, it will help you identify the intimacy gifts that they conceal.